Selective Eating: Say this, not that!
May 14, 2025
Tangible strategies for a parent/guardian of a picky eater

Our Registered Dietitian (RD) has some practical tips to incorporate into mealtime for a more successful, enjoyable child-food relationship. The goals of these interaction are to create a positive relationship with food, enjoy happy meal times, reduce anxiety, reduce battles surrounding food, and fitting all types of food into a healthy lifestyle.
Mealtime Tips from an RD:
- Choose not to bribe
- Parents can decide WHAT is being served, WHEN it is being served and HOW it is being served; Children can decide IF they want to eat it and HOW MUCH they want to eat.
- Family meals are so important (even if only a couple of times a week), as at family meals, parents can model behaviors.
- Use meal time for talking and catching up about the day, reduce electronic (TV, tablet, phones) distractions.
- Be sure each meal contains at least one preferred food.
Say/Do this… Not that…
You don’t have to eat anything you don’t want to. | You don’t have to eat anything you don’t want to. |
---|---|
Wait without comment | You loved it when you were a baby. |
We will have XXXX soon. | When your child is unhappy with the men. |
This pasta is the same as the one I’ve cooked before, just a different shape. (No need to explain further.) | This is sooo yummy, you’ll love it. |
Let’s enjoy a bite of candy a little bit later OR serve candy with dinner. | Candy is junk food; You can’t have dessert unless you eat XXXX. |
Could we please have a side of bread for the table? (at a restaurant) | My picky eater will only eat bread, could we please have some? |
Have your child help blend up zucchini for muffins. | Don’t sneak food into recipes. |
You can eat it when you are ready. (Be sure to have them sit at the table for an age appropriate amount of time and then let them leave if they want.) | Take a bite of everything on your plate, then you can be excused. |
Can you describe XXXX it to me? | XXXX looks/smells funny/strange. |
Just don’t say anything. Try not to ‘sell’ the food. | I made it the way you like it. |
Kitchen is closed and will open again at XXXX time. | Child is ‘grazing’ and parent allows it bc they are concerned the child hasn’t eaten. |
It is best for a child to sit at a table or counter. Children can be more in tune to their hunger/fullness cues and safer for them. | Child wants to walk around and eat. |
Parent says: That’s ok, you don’t have to eat it. | Child says: Broccoli is gross. |
Act neutral and just don’t react. |

Getting a selective eater to try new foods is a process. Keep in mind that the goal is to provide your child with the opportunity to be exposed to new foods. Continue to introduce them to unfamiliar foods, have them see that you eat and enjoy them, all the while making sure they have safe foods that they know they can count on. Giving your child permission helps to reduce anxiety around new foods. Inviting your child to be around and try new foods is a very different experience than forcing them to try new foods.

With summer here, your kiddos are likely on a constant hunt for snacks. To help them develop healthy eating habits, try spacing meals and snacks about two hours apart. This gives their little tummies time to feel hungry, enjoy a snack, and recognize when they’re full. When kids “graze” throughout the day—eating small amounts here and there—their bodies have a harder time learning to recognize hunger and fullness cues. Grazing can also lead to more frequent choices of less nutritious, grab-and-go snacks. Let's Support Healthier Habits To support healthier habits, pre-plan snack options and post a visual snack “menu” on the fridge. This gives kids structure, helps them feel independent, and encourages better choices. And why not make snack time fun and educational? Try simple food crafts together—it’s a great way to bond with your child(ren), have fun in the kitchen, and explore possible new foods at the same time! UNDER THE SEA: Shark Snack Cups from Mommy's Fabulous Finds Festive treat made with yogurt, jello, cool whip, graham crackers and optional gummy shark Shark Week Bait from Alex Daynes A lighter treat that includes popcorn, white chocolate chips, f ood coloring/sprinkles, Sixlet Candies, gummy sharks, and pretzel goldfish Candy Sushi from Happy Family Recipes Themed snack made with Rice Krispie Treats (butter, marshmallows, vanilla, Rice Krispie Cereal) Fruit Roll-Ups, large Swedish fish, mini Swedish Fish BEACH + ANIMAL THEMES: Beach Bear Dirt Cups from Made To Be A Momma Celebrate summer with pool inspired lounging! Ingredients include: Teddy Grahams, white chocolate pudding, milk, cool whip, graham crackers, gummy life savers Curious George Snack from Mess for Less (tip, Read a Curious George book to go along with this one!) Enjoy a book and a snack with this Curious George inspired snack! Ingredients include: Nutella, s liced bananas, b lueberries, r ice cakes Animal Tracks Snacks from Loreen Leedy Great snack for the outdoorsy kid who enjoys animals! You can use a variety of ingredients including: cheese, crackers, pretzels, cream cheese, almonds and pepperoni FOR THE NATURE LOVER: Nature Snacks : Edible Crafts for Kids - Parties With A Cause A large variety of snacks for nature lover of all kinds including all sorts of flora and fauna options! POPSICLES: Fresh Fruit Popsicles from One Little Project How to Make Fruit Popsicles with Real, Fresh Fruit Strawberry Breakfast Popsicles from Fraiche Living We can imagine all sorts of variations of this recipe! Start with the following simple ingredients: yogurt, fresh strawberries, milk (or your choice) lemon juice and granola Frozen Yogurt Banana Pops from Kalejunkie Such a simple, yet festive recipe that uses ingredients commonly found in the kitchen such as bananas, yogurt and sprinkes! FOOD IMPOSTERS: Pancake Donuts from Balanced with Babies Made with just two ingredients: pancake mix and milk! You will need a fun donut shaped mold for this recipe Breakfast Banana Split - Art From My Table Ingredients include: banana, yogurt, blackberries, raspberries, granola, mini chocolate chips Fruit Cracker Pizzas from Sunshine & Hurricanes Crackers + cream cheese + fruit! Watermelon Rice Krispy Treats from My Heavenly Recipes Festive treat to be shared! Made with butter, marshmallows, R ice Krispies, food coloring and chocolate chips

Think your child is "just" clumsy? They may have Developmental Coordination Disorder, DCD, an infrequently known, but very treatable condition that affects 5%-6% of school aged children! Medical specialists, such as pediatric physical therapists, pediatric occupational therapists, and neurologists can help address the underlying nervous system and muscular issues contributing to DCD.